“There's nothing like rejection to make you do an inventory of
yourself.” – James Lee Burke
It is a gulling feeling to be told
you are just not good enough. To have the door to your dream closed once again.
However, it also is a fortifying time where you revaluate your choices and
discover more about your motives and what you want out of life.
This will be my forth time
applying to medical school. The first of course was in year 13; I was very
under prepared and quite unsurprisingly rejected. The second time was at the
last year of my neuroscience degree, I was at a better place in terms of
maturity and had a clearer picture of where I needed to be. I made it to
interviews, but nerves got the better of me and I was again rejected. The third
attempt I was determined not to let my nerves or anything else get into my way,
unfortunately my focus was more on the interview process than my UKCAT and
I got a considerably lower score than I had the previous year, I was rejected
before interviews, leaving me with yet another
‘gap’ year.
The part that most upsets/annoys
me is the wasted time. There is nothing worse than doing something you know you
have no business doing for a prolong amount of time without a clear picture of
where you are going to be. The uncertainty and fogginess of the situation is by
far the hardest part. I know I will become a doctor. It is just a matter of
when. I can’t in all honesty continue on in limbo for many more years. It is
ridiculous.
Which is why I'm so glad I'm doing my MSc. Instead of having another year of mind numbing employment, I should
enrich my mind and train myself for a lifelong study. So I have decided to view
the latest round of rejection as an opportunity to invest in my future and
bolster my future prospects.
